One of my New Year resolutions (in addition to blogging more) was to get myself to a doctor for an annual check up. It had been several years (ok, over 7) since I had been. My doctor had moved, and after she left I never really bothered to find another one. It just seemed like too much work to find a new one.
I didn’t feel terrible, I just didn’t feel fantastic.
Most of the time I felt like I was losing my mind which I just chalked up to the stress of owning a business, poor eating, hormonal, and waaaaaaaaaaay too much time self diagnosing myself on WebMD.
I had a customer who had some health issues and found a doctor that did Integrated Medicine and loved her new doctor. I thought “Well that sounds interesting! I’ll make an appointment!”
Appointment day comes, I like this new doctor, she’s great. We do all the regular stuff, some blood work, some not regular stuff, and some more tests.
Doctor says “let’s make an appointment to go over the results”
Ok, that sounds good!
For a week or more I stressed myself out with worry. I was positive my blood pressure was out of control, I was diabetic, had a heart condition, ooooooooh my WebMD Doctoring kicked in and I was convinced death would be knockin on my door soon.
The follow-up day comes, and not too soon, as I probably could have worried myself to death…………
Blood pressure good, colesteral good, sugar levels good, thyroid good, ……everything is good! Not really a damn thing wrong with me!
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm go figure!
Then the Doctor says……… I think the problems that you’re experiencing are all really stemming from some food allergies.
WHAT?? NO WAY!!
So immediately I think (because I’m a doctor ya know) NO PROBLEM!
I’ll just start eating more of those foods and build up a tolerance! Makes sense right?
Then the Doc starts in, goes down her little list of what should now be off limits;
Now as she’s talking, I’m not really listening the only thing I can think about is………………..
Damn! That sounds like a really good pizza to me! I should go have pizza when I leave here!
Once I came back to reality and back to my senses, I realized what she was saying.
NO MORE SANDWICHES? Are you kidding? I live on sandwiches… I literally live on sandwiches!
No chicken? How will I live? What will I eat?
Mozzerella cheese……..no way! How is that going to work during tomato season? Caprice salad is a staple at my house. No Lasagna? Are you kidding? No pasta or cheese???
Dig the hole and put me in it! My life has come to an end!
Black pepper? Now I’m thinking she might be a some sort of quack! .
Calm down Timi, maybe she doesn’t know what she’s saying or realize the implications of this information. Maybe she can’t see that you are ready to have a nervous breakdown.
Well to make an already long story short, it’s been about 3 weeks and I’m not totally off the sauce! Me and gluten are in the middle of what is going to be a very long ugly break up!
We’ve had a great love affair for so many years. We were good together!
Que music……….. The Way We Were by Barbara Streisand.
Like the corners of brownies
Of the way we were
Of salads left behind
Smiles we gave to one another
For the way we were…………..
You get the idea! It’s ugly!
Chicken, mushrooms, mozzarella cheese and black pepper…… well we’re just kind of in a “booty call” relationship right now. I don’t see it lasting much longer. Easier to kick it to the curb than I had thought. But I can’t resist a cocktail and callin them up sometimes!
If you have any recipes, tricks or ideas on how to break up forever with my loves, please post it in the comments. I could use all the help I can get!